Stumble It!
As a stressed-out caregiver, I was thrilled to put my husband Adrian on a plane yesterday morning to visit his son. Yet in the middle of the night, I woke up feeling anxious and guilty.
"How could I be so happy about getting rid of him?" I thought. "I must be a bad wife!"
The same ambivalent feelings used to appear when I was the caregiver for my father several years ago, and one of my siblings would take over the job for me. These feelings were often expressed by me over-controlling how my siblings took care of Dad.
I had the same impulse with Adrian, and could have ruined his whole trip by giving his son a detailed list of things to remember. But thankfully, I held back. "Let the two of them work it out," I decided.
So when I was anxious and guilty in the middle of the night, I told myself I'd feel better in the morning, and I went back to sleep.
Lo and behold, I do feel better today!
